All I want is a spicy tuna roll. Just one little inside-out spicy tuna roll from Iron Chef House, doused in soy sauce with just a dab of wasabi. It’s all I can think about. It’s all I can daydream about.
Fortunately it’s not all I can actually dream about; the most recent unconscious nightly sex romp was with none other than Jay Mohr. So Yvonne, if you’re reading? Tell your buddy Jay he was awesome–maybe even better than Jon Stewart. Also thank him for bringing the red wine.
I insisted on ordering Japanese food for dinner tonight, perhaps to torture myself (or test myself?) since I know that Nate, that scallywag, that scamp, will order my taboo dish for his very own. The eight beautifully composed pieces taunt me from the take-out container, where they nestle cozily against my own pathetically unsatisfying vegetable rolls. They’re already touching, I try justifying. They’re already touching!
I fantasize about pilfering a single piece when Nate’s not looking, distracting him by switching the channel from Aqua Teen Hunger Force to Wife Swap. While he rants and raves and makes a big show of snatching away the remote control, I will swoop in, downing one of his precious rolls in a single bite.
I know he’s onto me. I know he’s keeping count of his pieces, mentally subtracting one each time the chopsticks hit his mouth. The cretin. The bastard.
Today, I turned down chocolate cake. I ate a single Pepperidge Farm Cookie off a cookie tray at work (and Greg will back me up on the difficulty of that). Nate brought home a black and white milkshake for me the other day that is yet untouched and congealing at the bottom of our freezer drawer. I have yet to eat a single Pop Tart since the pee hit the stick that one fateful morning in August. But for some reason, the true forbidden fruit taunts this pregnant woman and her vulnerable immune system above all else.
Why, spicy tuna rolls? Why?
Whyyyyyyyyyyy?
60 shards of brilliance… read them below or add one
I had a very excellent friend who brought me a plate of tuna sashimi in the hospital after delivery. She is/was a God to me that day. Here’s hoping you find similar friends.
Oh I feel your pain! I craved sushi and wine during my first pregnancy, and am going through the same w/this one (I think I’m close to you in weeks, and my first is 2 mos older than Thalia –let’s hear it for being of “advanced maternal age” and popping them out as soon as possible!) I’ve already had a spider roll, all that deep frying has to kill all the bad bugs, right? I like all the suggestions of getting the spicy sauce on a CA roll, go for it!!
I gave into the sushi craving (especially tuna) during my 2nd trimester – saw a doc on tv that said it was fine. That was good enough for me! I ate it on several occasions during my pregnancy and everything was fine. Just do it!
I feel your pain!! Through my whole pregnancy, I have been craving the summer sausage my dad loves and was always in the fridge when I was growing up. I haven’t eaten it in about 15 years, but for some reason it’s the only thing I want to eat every single day. But alas, every single book I buy and every pregnancy website says not to eat it. Only 12 more weeks to go…
I gave in and ate both spicy tuna and yellowtail. The place we go to is simply impeccable, and I think the whole ‘don’t eat sushi when prego’ is really overpushed. What do Japanese ladies do? Suddenly not touch raw fish for all 9-plus months? I say indulge. Maybe not daily or even weekly, but monthly, for damn sure. And, if you’re chicken, how about the unagi? Nothing like the flaky tenderness of delicious eel…
I am so sorry. But you are pregnant, and doesn’t that make it somehow ok that you must forego the spicy tuna, and the wine, and the… ??? I guess not. I would like to be pregnant, so by that logic, eating a spicy tuna roll will make me feel better?
Ha Ha Ha! Now THAT is funny. While I never had any real cravens with any of my four kids, I could not stand the smell of garlic or popcorn. These are my FAVORITE foods (is garlic a food group) but the smell, as soon as I became pregnat, would make me want to die instead of doing all that barfing my body did.
I can’t eat sushi ever since my first pregnancy… but still I say EAT it if you wanna
I just stumbled across your blog and this post really stuck with me….OK, I’m not pregnant yet, but we are trying and I have to say that I’ve already told my husband that the first thing he has to bring me after delivery is sushi–a spicy tuna roll to be precise. From our favorite restaurant. (Is he even allowed?!?) I can not imagine nine months without sushi. *Shudder*
I keep telling myself that I’m craving raw tuna because I need the iron. And eating it wouldn’t be THAT bad, right? Right? It’s for the BABY. So also is the Gin and Tonic. It has quinine. Babies need that. A pregnant woman who goes on vacation to a tropical location and abstains from delicious fresh seafood and boat drinks deserves to be sainted.