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Lucky Charms: God’s Cereal

6.20.2008

When you get a pitch from Lucky Charms, you answer it. Because as long-time blog readers know, the Lucky Charms guy is God.

Basically they added a new marshmallow to their cereal and would I like a free sample to find out what it is? How could I resist! My mind reeled at all the outstanding marshmallow shape possibilities:

The number seven?

A gold dubloon?

A skull and crossbones?

A scale representation of the Great Barrier Reef?

A crop circle?

An afro pick?

The virgin mary?

A DNA double helix?

Carmen Miranda?

The Microsoft logo?

Van Gogh’s ear?

(General Mills, if you ever want me in on your new product ideation sessions, I’m available.)

Nope, wrong on all counts. It was an hourglass.


Darn.

But a magic hourglass with the power to control time.

Evidently it also has the power to turn the entire box of cereal into crack, because it’s the first thing my daughter woke up asking for every morning until it was gone.

By the way, you know you’re getting old when you wish that the Lucky Charms cereal to marshmallow ratio was weighted a little more heavily towards the cereal.

Apologies to all the other PR pitches which did not make it onto my blog this week, including but not limited to a “me time” promotion at a coffee bar on the other side of the country, the chance to win a body and face treatment at the value of ___ (It literally said that. She forgot to fill in the blank), car wax to “keep the interior and exterior of your vehicle in tip top shape, but also work wonders to restore, protect and shine household surfaces”, a coupon for diapers, a new towel, delicious meal and snack recipes, six books, five new websites or blogs, two upload your own video about blahblahblah for a chance to win blahblah contests, a new coffee beverage, some air fresheners, and gum.

I will put you back into the PR pitch fishbowl and draw a new lucky winner to post about at random next week. So keep those pitches coming! I can’t get enough. Especially the ones that address me as “Dear Julie.”

It does help if you have God affiliated with your company.

38 shards of brilliance… read them below or add one

PunditMom June 20, 2008 at 5:48 pm

I’ll take that magic hour glass — how much extra time does it give to moms??

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Josette at Halushki June 20, 2008 at 5:51 pm

I saw the Virgin Mary in a waffle once.How could they not choose afro pick as the new shape? What kid doesn’t like afro picks?

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Backpacking Dad June 20, 2008 at 6:29 pm

I had a bowl of rice-flake-woodchips for breakfast.I miss Lucky Charms. And way to go killing the suspense of the new marshmallow. I remember when they added the purple horseshoe and there was an entire campaign about how the design was related to this one frame of a LC commercial with a big “To Be Continued…” tag at the end. We had to wait half a year or something for the second half to see a big purple horse kick down his stall door and show us the shape.I’ll never that suspense again.Thanks to you :}

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Backpacking Dad June 20, 2008 at 6:30 pm

“have”

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Mir June 20, 2008 at 7:02 pm

I love you.That is all. ;)

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Zip n Tizzy June 20, 2008 at 7:35 pm

Hey Julie,I can’t believe you didn’t go for the gum!

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Bea June 20, 2008 at 7:40 pm

Lucky Charms is the magic cereal that has Pie eating breakfast consistently for the first time since the days when I shoved infant rice cereal in her face whether she liked it or not. Of course, she only eats the marshmallows, and whatever “numbers” sneak onto the spoon with them.

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Reff June 20, 2008 at 8:07 pm

Wait. I thought a hourglass is the Microsoft logo?–nerd jokes are the best. aren’t they? Yes, they are the best.–

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Fairly Odd Mother June 20, 2008 at 8:30 pm

With that headline, I thought for sure it was going to be a marshmallow crucifix. Van Gogh’s ear is pretty good too though.Mmmmmm. . .Lucky Charms—-I used to eat all the cereal first and save the marshmallows for last.

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Fairly Odd Mother June 20, 2008 at 8:31 pm

Awww, cute, husband and wife comments so close to each other. ; )

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Roya Rose June 20, 2008 at 8:37 pm

I am madly in love with lucky charms…they should put those marshmallows in bags and sell them as candy.

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Mitzi Green June 20, 2008 at 10:14 pm

no, they’re better than crack–they’re magically delicious. there’s no better pms snack fix than a big ol’ box o’ lucky charms or my name isn’t mcclanahan.

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katie June 20, 2008 at 10:59 pm

Damn, I was rooting for the afro pick.

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Motherhood Uncensored June 20, 2008 at 11:54 pm

Nipples. I’m thinking they need a nipple marshmallow.

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mothergoosemouse June 21, 2008 at 12:16 am

Hey, I got a package this week addressed to Liz.

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Sunny June 21, 2008 at 1:29 am

I never had lucky charms when I was a kid, and I thought I was so deprived. Now that I am a mom I don’t buy them either. My kids probably feel deprived.

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jonniker June 21, 2008 at 3:52 am

Did you get the one back in the day that noted how much you write about Kraft products? That was my favorite. “I’ve been reading your blog, and I know you eat bagels and other Kraft products for breakfast!”Seriously. I have a high tolerance for that kind of thing, but even that killed me dead. I enjoy KRAFT PRODUCTS.

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Lady M June 21, 2008 at 7:32 am

I would totally blog about Lucky Charms if they sent me some. I’d have to eat it outside though, because SwingDaddy doesn’t like the smell of oats. In the meantime, I guess I’m stuck reading through those StrongMom Similac mailers and getting coupons for yogurt with extra fiber (huh?).

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ALM June 21, 2008 at 11:59 am

Omigod – I love lucky charms!!! The kids don’t stand a chance when it’s in our house – I inhale it!

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Alexis June 21, 2008 at 1:09 pm

I’m partial to Cap’n Crunch myself, although they do not contain the freeze-dried-yet-strangely-delicious marshmallows.I think I like you skull and crossbones idea the best. A hipper, tougher Lucky Charms is the way to go!

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Marinka June 21, 2008 at 1:13 pm

I am such a sucky parent that my kids still haven’t had Lucky Charms! Yes, fun times at our place!

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mrs. q. June 21, 2008 at 3:19 pm

We bought a box for St. Patty’s Day. Yeah, I know– it’s not really Irish, but then again, I’m not either, despite my last name. Anyhoo, Jamie and I spent half the morning trying to figure out what some of the shapes were. I swear I thought one was a bomb. And I, too, wished there was a little less ‘smellow and more crunhy bits. My fillings hurt.

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kittenpie June 21, 2008 at 3:49 pm

Enh, all you cool moms are the same, aren’t you, Kristen? I mean, Julie? Er, whateveahyournameis?

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carrie June 21, 2008 at 10:31 pm

That stuff is like crack.I can’t keep it in the house.

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Amanda June 21, 2008 at 11:43 pm

I was never allowed to have sugar cereal, this post has my mouth crackling with the memory of the 2 times we had Trix…crack, indeed.

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Christina June 23, 2008 at 3:06 pm

I’d gladly whore myself out for Lucky Charms. Once as a kid I ate all the marshmallows from an entire box and then poured all of the cereal back into the box again. Still had to eat it, though, before I got a new box. And I totally took them up on the diaper coupon offer. Free and cheap are good right now. But a car wax that you can use on household surfaces? Ick.

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Jessica June 23, 2008 at 10:26 pm

Lucky Charms are just excellent

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sean June 23, 2008 at 10:27 pm

Lucky charms are my favorites no matter what the shapes are!

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Heather B. June 25, 2008 at 5:45 am

I have been craving lucky charms for weeks. Tomorrow I will have to fulfill my craving. I’m drooling and counting down the hours until breakfast.

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nextcommunication June 27, 2008 at 3:59 am

My daughter loves her “luckies” as she calls them. She will eat them all day if she could. So while I’ve been home this week with the kids, she has. <>Father of the year<> here I come!

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Crap That Bugs Me June 28, 2008 at 2:37 am

We bought these for my husband for Fathers Day, it was his best gift!

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Crap That Bugs Me June 28, 2008 at 2:37 am

We bought these for my husband for Fathers Day, it was his best gift!

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Wendy June 29, 2008 at 2:54 am

My kids call them “Yucky Charms.” I don’t know why they do this, since they eat them like there’s no tomorrow. By the way, except for the sugar, they aren’t that bad for you. Lots of fiber and vitamins. Who says being a grown up has to taste like sawdust?http://www.notesfromthesleepdeprived.blogspot.com

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Cloudsters June 29, 2008 at 9:25 am

Am really enjoying a maiden dip into your blog! But…The Microsoft logo?Van Gogh’s nose?

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VDog July 2, 2008 at 5:40 pm

You mean your name’s NOT Julie? SNAP!

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Meg July 9, 2008 at 10:31 am

WHOA! You’ve officially made it as a blogger when you get free Lucky Charms!

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Adam Buchanan July 28, 2008 at 4:44 pm

should have been a cell phone. that way our 2 year olds will start wanting one!

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Ed- Cleaners' Hub October 15, 2010 at 3:19 pm

Microsoft Logo….lol.

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