Bad parenting report, week 189

Last night Sage woke up crying which she does every so often. I went in to check on her figuring she just needed a diaper change or some rocking.


I had put her to sleep with a shoe in her footsie pajamas.

A shoe.

In her pajamas.

It was right around her butt in the back, so yeah, I guess she was a little uncomfortable sleeping ON A SHOE.

The culprit. You can just tell it’s up to no good.

Let’s say I’m overwhelmed with life a bit these days. There are times I am parenting half asleep, like I’m going through the motions but my head is not entirely in the game. All the business of parenting – the birthday party coordination, the school obligations, the wardrobe refreshing, pediatrician visits, the tuition payments (gak), the childcare – all conspire to take up brain cells that could be spent on actual parenting. Not to mention the business of blogging, the business of running a household, the business of business…

A shoe.

In her pajamas.

That’s okay, two nights ago I left the oven on. Again.


76 thoughts on “Bad parenting report, week 189”

  1. Thanks for the morning chuckle! Now I won’t feel so bad when I try to convince my daughter , who is hurriedly rushing to get ready to come downstairs to eat her promised egg for breakfast, that when I was enjoying it I really thought there were more in the beer fridge, or that she had changed her mind and didn’t realize it yet, or … oh I’m so going to have to think fast. deb

  2. It sucks being human and being a mother, doesn’t it? I always kind of thought that when I became a Mom I’d magically get all of the answers uploaded to my brain overnight, but I’m still waiting 2.5 years in…

  3. It all happened to me before. ok, not the shoe mainly the oven thing. But still. It’s mommy brain, it happens to the best of us.I have the solution to your parental stress. Come with me to a party on Friday – opening night of NYFW. One hour, gift bags, free drinks. And if anyone asks, you’re my photographer.

  4. If you were a dad, you’d totally give yourself a pass on this. Unless it was, like, <>your<> shoe. And you were wearing it.

  5. You need a break.. Seriously, even just an hour to yourself. I hope that you can take it.P.S. A shoe in her pajamas is really not so bad. Its not like it was an open pocket knife or something.

  6. Sigh, I hear you. I once put Dante to bed with BOTH LEGS in one leg hole. Lovely. I give you a pass. And, what are you doing near an oven? Don’t you have a chef-wannabee in that home?

  7. That’s hilarious. I’ve accidently left tons of socks, still uncomfortable, but never shoes. I have left the oven on though. Stove top too once. Thanks for the laughs!

  8. I just realized my comment sounded stalker-ish. I just thought it’s be a chance to meet one of my fave bloggers before I move back to Europe!! Trying to align myself with the whole Carpe Diem thing 🙂

  9. Har. I did that with a pacifier once. And last night I left a stove burner on too. I look at it this way: at least these people are clothed and fed, right?

  10. Oh, I don’t think I have ever laughed that hard this early in the morning!Thanks for sharing!

  11. But is was SUCH a cute shoe! I have left the oven on and I don’t even have a baby to care for. I suck.

  12. I haven’t done that specific thing, but things like it? Oh hell yeah. Who isn’t on autopilot sometimes – okay, often – as a parent of the very young? They sap you of you rstrength and your brains, I tell you.

  13. I’m sure we’ve all done something like this. As for the oven? I leave it on all the time. In fact, it’s more common for us to discover it still on 3 hours later than not. Yay me!

  14. Don’t beat yourself up; that sort of thing happens. Besides, if it were anyone else, it would be pretty funny, right?

  15. hehe…uhm, I left eggs on to boil and went to the store. Luckily, I only caused a large mess of egg with a lot of smoke, but no fire. I’ve also left the gas grill on. It happens.And it was not fun picking egg shells out of the ceiling paint.

  16. I just literally laughed out loud! Thanks for sharing that. This will be a good one to bring up when she’s older. You two will probably get a couple more giggles out of it. I’ve done pretty strange things myself, it is really comforting to know I’m not alone 🙂

  17. Monday night I went to bed before Gabriel. Yeah, he’s 3? He put away his toys, got into his jamas, and even remembered to put on his pullup. He got into my bed instead of his, but I’m certainly not complaining.I’m not sure if that says something good about my parenting that he knew to do all that stuff, or something awful that he had the opportunity.

  18. At least there wasn’t mouse shit in the oven this time.And at least you got up to see what was the matter. I’d have been all, “Oh, go back to sleep, you’re fine,” and then hated myself even more in the morning.

  19. That’s so funny! I’m so scattered lately that I keep driving to my daughter’s pre-school even when my destination isn’t anywhere nearby. It’s like my brain fogs and my muscle memory takes me there!

  20. Ok, I’m torn between laughing my head off and heaving a sigh of relief.Working moms need a whole separate closet for the hats we wear.

  21. That’s a fantastic line Lisse.And thank you all for being as spazzy as I am these days. Or at least pretending to be. Either way, it’s extremely comforting.

  22. Thanks for sharing and making it feel okay for the rest of us who are floudering out here. It’s all okay. And it makes for some funny storytelling!

  23. I once put a kid down in footsie pajamas–on backward. His little toes were turning blue. Funny thing was, he didn’t seem to be nearly as worried about it as I was.

  24. Oh it definitely happens, on Sunday my husband found a block of cheese in the junk drawer. He thought that our 2 year old must have done it and for a minute I did consider keeping my mouth shut but I fessed up. Tami in NY

  25. Oh, this post and this whole comment thread is making me feel so much better about my own Moments of Extreme Absent-Mindedness. I thought I must be seriously mentally flawed what with all my leaving the oven on and barely remembering appointments in time and forgetting for hours where I’d set my tea.

  26. Yeah. That’s one for the books.At least you didn’t accidentally lift your kid into a moving ceiling fan.*ahem*I know there are SO MANY THINGS wrong with that sentence. Like why do you have a ceiling fan that is so low to the floor? How could you not recognize the danger as you were underneath it? Really? You’re only 5’2″?We survive. We get sleep. We rennovate. Things get better. Promise.

  27. I laugh but only because it makes me feel better. The other morning I went to get the baby from her crib and found her munching a couple of Cheerios. I have no idea where they came from.

  28. A shoe. In her pajamas.I’m sorry… I almost peed my pants laughing there.I completely understand. I can’t seem to keep up with this whole mom thing. Thanks for sharing that. We all do those crazy things once in a while.

  29. If it makes you feel any better I once let my kid whine and cry at me for awhile, I thought she was just being a pill. When I eventually decided to wonder what was bugging her, I found a Lego. In her diaper. yeah, mom o’ the world award, not going to me.Tomorrow is another day. You get the chance to try and do better tomorrow.

  30. I let Jasper go to sleep the other day with a spoon shoved down his diaper. He seemed to want it there, so there’s that, but still.And I leave the oven on every time I use it, so.

  31. Laughing so hard . . . and also at myself for trying to reason with a three year old who says “I’m being careful!” while stacking footstools on the coffeetable and climbing the pile.

  32. I know how you feel. I did a similar thing with socks in the footies, so now we don’t have footies. That’s my advice – lower your standards. 🙂Seriously, someday this will be a funny story, not a therapy session.

  33. I love this! I had to copy and paste this to my husband, telling him that this is probably something that we’ll end up doing as new parents in a few months… 🙂

  34. Poor baby! Bad momma, bad momma! But don’t worry, we’ve all been there before. It’s not like she’s going to remember this episode anyway. Not like the time I was over 3 hours late picking up my daughter from camp. I’ve scarred my baby for life!

  35. At least it was an adorably stylin’ shoe.My son has no clean pants to wear to school today. I had to pull a presentable pair out of the hamper. Oops… guess I should do some laundry.

  36. Well, at least you are not the mom that let their child sleep with them from day one! Ha Ha, that mom is me! Attachment parenting, more like never sleep again parenting! 🙂

  37. When my youngest daughter was still in diapers she developed the habit of being a “hoarder” and when I would go to change her diaper I would find things that she treasured stashed away…crayonsquarters, nickels, dimes, penniesmatch box carsa sock or twoa spoonsome soggy cheeriosand anything else she thought was valuable. I must say though that she never tried to hide a shoe in there…thank god!

  38. That link got cut off… This is from kiwords (love her!)…Tonight, after a long and arduous bedtime, I went into Max and Raphi’s room to see if they had ever indeed gone to sleep. They had, and Raphi was turned completely around and sleeping with his head hanging off the foot of his bed. These sorts of gymnastics are not unusual for him. I picked him up to reposition him, and he stirred and muttered something. I put him down on his pillow, and he muttered again. “Ah have an octopus in me.”“Um…what?”His fingers were feebly working at the zipper to his jammies. “Dere is an octopus.”I helped him unzip his jammies, and sure enough, plastered to his belly, was an orange plastic octopus. I removed it and zipped him back up.“Hey, Honey? Don’t put octopuses in your jammies anymore, ok?” He nodded and grinned.“But dat WAS funny.”Well. I have nothing to add to that.

  39. Once we had a sitter dress our son in footie pajamas over the top of quite thick socks. It was an interesting discovery the next morning, I had a nice chuckle about it. This shoe incident is hilarious and I wouldn’t beat yourself up about it.

  40. It’s a long strange trip sista! No one and I mean NO ONE warned me and even if they did? I wouldn’t have listened. Hugs and it was just a shoe. At least you didn’t put her to sleep in the oven…

  41. That’s everyday life. Although we want to < HREF="" REL="nofollow">be a good parent.<>

  42. I am SO frickin relieved that so many other people have done these things! I beat myself up all the time (especially because I often take Mothergoosemouse’s path…”eh, your fine go back to sleep.”) I know the kid won’t even remember it, but I just feel so crappy when this stuff happens. Helps to laugh so hard at all the other stories! Thanks everyone!

  43. The shoe in the p.j.s is a new one for me (and funny!) but I wouldn’t put it past me, or any of us for that matter! I leave the oven on ALL. THE. TIME.

  44. Last week I found Jake’s jacket in the deep freezer. Now, the deep freeze is near the washer/dryer and the jacket was down there to be cleaned. Still. I still haven’t told my husband.

  45. OMG. I’m still LAUGHING.This is seriously the FUNNIEST POST that I’ve read in SO LONG.Wheeew.Thanks, I needed that.

  46. I just went back and read the comments and I have TEARS running down my face.Both legs in one hole! No diaper! Going to be before your toddler! I L O V E your readers. So, so funny.

  47. I can’t stop giggling. Too funny. Thanks for making me feel human … and like I’m not alone – smiles! My first time here … looking forward to reading more.

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