I love Pinterest. Loooove. Ever since we really started getting into our Pinterest boards for Cool Mom Picks and Cool Mom Tech I have found a wealth of inspiration, beauty, gift ideas, and general loveliness.
Also, complete batshit insanity.
Last night I come across a pin–I kid you not–featuring a DIY tutorial on redecorating your disposable 99-cent Scotch Tape dispenser.
I’ll let you sit with that one just a moment.
Evidently the old familiar tartan green plaid cardboard insert now requires an upgrade to something a little less Braveheart.
More surprising still, there were likes. There were oohs and aahs. There were repins–lots of them–and not onto boards called “batshit crazy DIY” either–or as Kristen Howerton cleverly puts it, diWHY?
Now I know that there is a vast and admirable lot of crafty people in the world. Really, I envy those women who make their own spring seed packet kits and hand them out as Easter gifts along with hand-felted bunnies that can be converted into brooches. I envy those who spend more time wrapping presents than most people do attending the actual birthday party. Some of them are my friends. Some of them are my relatives. Some of them are my stepmother, who I believe is physically incapable of handing someone a gift that does not look perfectly coiffed, gussied up, and ready for its close-up, Mr. DeMille.
Beautification as a priority in life; it’s kind of admirable when I think about it that way.
I’ve dabbled just a little in this world. I even took Design Mom‘s advice last year and sorted one single small bookshelf by color, and it now makes me inordinately happy to stare at it from my (unmade) bed each day. So I do see the joy of turning the ordinary into something just a little less so. Even if I am not so crafty.
But when I discover tutorials on lining the inside of your trashcan with imported washi paper, converting a diaper caddy into a lovely spring hat, or creating intricate creepy creature muffin-tin snacks that probably require 16 hours of preparation not including trips to four different international groceries across Astoria just so your kid can pull out the eyes and go, “ew…I hate raisins,” I have to wonder, who are these people?
And uh, would they mind coming to my house some time and helping me tackle a few projects, what with all that free time?
I still have phone calls to return from 2008. I have children that haven’t been bathed in two days, I have a suitcase from SxSW that still requires unpacking, I have a high-tech humidfier on the windowsill taunting me with its red, blinky refill light, and and 63 apps (yes, 63) on my iPhone that are screaming for an upgrade, as the Apple Store guy not so subtly admonished me last week. I have piles of dishes where they don’t belong, piles of laundry where they don’t belong, and a good 12 days worth of outfits threatening to topple my desk chair if you so much as breathe near it.
My to-do list is an ugly, ugly thing.
And so is my Scotch Tape dispenser.
If I can find it.
It’s around here somewhere. I think.