Ooh, They Got Me

“How can she possibly be one month?” I asked Nate on Monday. “Where did the month go? What have we done?”

“Look under your eyes,” he said. “There’s your answer.”


Later that day I was taking Sage on a needed walk around the neighborhood when I was approached by two cheerful students with clipboards, the types soliciting donations for some charity or another. The young man turned on the smile and headed in my direction with forceful determination,just as Sage started to do the diaper change squirm.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I just can’t right now.”

“That’s okay,” he said. “You look like you could use a shower.”

Oppressive fatigue has its benefits

40 thoughts on “Ooh, They Got Me”

  1. That is a riot.I can’t imagine ever saying that to anyone, no matter how much he or she was in need of a shower.Still laughing!

  2. How kind of those students. Can you detect the sarcasm in my type?Last week, a mall security guard asked me when I was due. When I told her, she commented that I looked much bigger, and she said that she thought I was going to say in a few weeks instead of a few months. I never know how to respond to those types of comments.Sage is beautiful, just like her big sister. Take care, Mama!

  3. Hysterical. Did they think you were homeless, or were they trying to be sympathetic with flat feet?

  4. Just catching up on your blog! Congratulations on having Sage – gorgeous name, by the way!!!Hilarious post, as always! Those kids were very nice te remind you to bathe! I would’ve said, “you could use some deodorant yourself”, just to get back at him. ;-P.

  5. Sage is adorable! Not sure what it is with people and manners these days. Has it ever been acceptable to comment on someone else’s hygiene?Amy Jo, the fact that she even asked shows she has no manners. I’d be tempted to reply “Due?” just to mess with her. 😉

  6. I know this is virtually impossible to believe, but one day you will look back on those days with fondness. You will even, on occasion, fervently wish for them back. Not that it doesn’t suck donkey weiner now. I remember. It’s why I stopped at two. Sage is beautiful, and I love the picture of Thalia and her together. Same sex siblings share a very special bond. The dude with the clipboard…did you knee him in the sac?

  7. I think I might have had to smack him though. Rude…even if it was true. Sage is so freaking cute. I love her chubby cheeks.

  8. He actually said that? I don’t know whether to be offended on your behalfy or laugh at the stupid things that come out of people’s mouths.

  9. Wow, they’ll never sell that whole box of candy for band camp with that approach. FORGET IT!!!!!!!!!! Oppressive fatigue is the perfect description of it. I remember so well. I completely get how sleep deprivation is a form of torture.Lisa

  10. har har! My <>husband<> said the same thing to me the other day.Actually he said, “Your hair is looking a little… greasy.”I wonder if I should start speaking to him again soon?

  11. “Ah, I see you’ve been to charm school. How nice. You should try that approach with ALL your potential customers. I bet you’ll sell a ton.” With as straight a face as humanly possible. 🙂And the wee ones are, indeed, adorable. ^_^

  12. What a cutie! Not you – you need a shower.(Man, I hope that kid wore that clipboard home…)Oh, by the way — send me your baby name list, please! I need some girl names (sans the Clinton Portis, please. LA Mommy shot that one down fast!)

  13. I took my first shower since Saturday evening this morning. So that comment could have been correctly aimed at me and I don’t even have a newborn. So there!

  14. Please tell me that one of those nimrods received a thump on the side of the head from your diaper bag. As if!She (they) are adorable. I cannot believe it’s been a month already!Carrie

  15. Lovely. People just don’t know how to keep their mouths shut, do they?A month already? Doesn’t seem like it’s been that long!

  16. Yikes….direct hit!!Let that never be my son disrespctin’ another woman….and one with a baby on top of that. I hope you told Sage to stay away from boys like that.

  17. I remember a nosy customer (a Larchmont beyotch) who kept asking when I was going to get pregnant. She finally asked, “You pregnant yet?” I said, “No, just fat.”She never asked again.

  18. I like to pretent I’m a pirate, because pirates never bathe. And I tell people, “Oh no, I’m not a mother of young children; I’m a pirate. I am actually very, very exciting and dangerous.”No?C’mere. First I’m going to sniff that baby’s beautiful head.Then I’m going to sniff yours.Congratulations on one-month-old. The baby, not your socks. 😉

  19. Yeah, b/c college students have the most fabulous hygiene. I would’ve lifted my armpit at him.Sage is sooo cute and love that photo of the girls co-sleeping.

  20. So…I guess in huckster parlance “you need a shower” is code for “catch you another time”, right?

  21. Ack! Well… at least you got out of the sales pitch, right?! (Sigh) the trials and tribulations of mothering. Every day is a new adventure!

  22. She is absolutely gorgeous. Love the expression and the smile that is just about to crack on that cute little face!Will have to introduce Sage and Little Bear at BlogHer … and beam proudly at our beautiful babies!

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