Nate and I are preparing to depart for the land of sombreros, ponchos, and other lame cultural clichés tomorrow. This also justifies my gross blog neglect this week – I could either spend a few more hours with my kids…or with all of yours. Mine won out, although a little narrowly for comfort.
This will be our first ever real vacation since I got pregnant with Thalia, and certainly the first time we’ve left Sage at all. Of course my heart starts breaking into bits at the thought of leaving them. Teeny little microscopic bits that just lie there in a big soup of guilt, quivering and heaving, and sometimes bumping into the small pieces of ham. I guess Guilt Soup is not kosher. Which is surprising when you think about it.
But then I remind myself about all the beachy wedding festivities in store, the boat tour, the free-flowing margaritas, seeing my nearly 90 year-old grandmother dancing the hora as played by a mariachi band, along with the then possibility of my first full night’s sleep in twelve months (!!!) and I think it will be just awesome. Provided I can get over the fact that I have to wear a bathing suit in public.
Hey, I tell myself, I weren’t meant to have thighs the size of small schooners, God wouldn’t have invented the pareo.
The girls (I’m still not used to saying that – how weird) will be staying with Grammy and Grandpa, who have graciously agreed to take over costume making duty, thus sparing Thalia the humiliation of going trick-or-treating around our building as something incorporating Saran Wrap, tin foil, and a black sharpie.
Grammy asked me to put together a list for her with instructions for the girls, and as I write her bedtime instructions, it is making me laugh.
-Thalia likes to go to sleep with many binkies. She will ask for “More binkies!” regardless of how many she has. So give her two or three and hold one for negotiation. You will need it.
-Thalia wants to put her PJs on “all by herself.” Make sure to help her with this.
-If Thalia asks to sleep in her sleeping bag, it’s not actually a sleeping bag. It’s a small, drawstring cotton bag that a sleeping bag came in. A sleeping bag bag. She fits in it up to her hips.
-Put her in the sleeping bag bag, then layer blankets on her in the following order: Purple blanket (shiny side down), pink blanket, cherries blanket, Momsie blanket. If you forget the sleeping bag bag, you will have to start the layering process all over again.
-You may be tempted to leave her bottoms off if the warmer weather keeps up. I’d caution not to think of them as pajama bottoms – think of the as thing that keeps her diaper on.
-If you do not keep her diaper on you will not be happy in the morning. Let’s just leave it at that.
It’s funny how our kids’ routines seem so, well..routine, until we have to describe them to someone else. And how much sometimes we curse these routines for taking our time and energy when there’s a show to watch or a dog to walk or a post to write or something we’d rather be doing. And how much sometimes we wish we could pass these routines onto someone else.
And then, when we do pass them onto someone else, how very much we will miss them.
Adios, amigos. I’m happy to do a Cuervo shot for you – but you’re on your own with the hangover.
Have a great time. And that’s quite a mental image with the hora and the mariachi band! 😉
ah, guilt soup. my mother has a german recipe we’ve been enjoying for decades.>>the routine is hilarious. our little man has THREE blankies and notices immediately if one is missing.>>and thanks for the title. i remember that song from spanish class and will now sing it ALL DAY!!>>arrrrriba! have fun…
The routine thing is so funny! I should write down my son’s routine for a good laugh!>>Oh, and on the diaper thing, we took to taping it on with duct tape. How sad is that?
I wouldn’t dare laugh. We’re heading to Florence in two weeks for our own very first post-kids child-free vacation(except that my oldest is already 6.5!, yes, it’s been that long) and the list of instructions for my parents is 8 pages long. In my defense, they’ll be staying in my house, which is in a foreign country, and will still have to get the kids to all their various school and after-school activities, not to mention run the german-speaking washer, dryer and dishwasher. Still, 8 pages and I’m not done yet…>>Have a wonderful, relaxing time!
Yes, drink tequila for me! Is jealous soup kosher? Because I’ve got a big vat of that.
I am a regular reader of your blog, but never comment. I had to this time, your Thalia reminds me of my Alex. Routines and order keep him sane. If we vary even the slightest from the routine, watch out. The blanket layering is the best!! LOL Have fun on your trip. It is so great to get away, it will also be great when you come home to those beautiful faces!!
i’m going to steal this idea for a post of my own! have a great time in the warmer weather and sleep in an extra hour for me, this infant/toddler thing is really cutting into my shut-eye!
Have a great time! Can’t wait to hear all about the trip! 🙂
I love all the different blankies. My nieces have a routine that’s sort of like that. But they don’t make me do it, when they’re here. I bet by the time you get back, Grammy will be giving you new instructions. Have a blast on your vacation.
Have a wonderful time!>>And the guilt soup bit? Brilliant. It’s one of my mother’s specialities.
Have fun!
The routine thing cracks me up. I love how specific you were…hopefully Grandma and Grandpa realize to keep a binky in reserve — it helps! >>By the way, the “tip” on remembering to leave the pj bottoms ON because they keep the diaper ON is hilarious. Of course, I can say that since I walked in one day last week to my son HANDING ME HIS DIAPER. Needless to say, it was dry and he wasn’t! >>Enjoy the beachy vacation…forget the shot, drink an entire margarita for me!
When you said “THE GIRLS” – I thought you meant, um, you know.>>Those ones.>>ahem.>>That tells you where my mind is at.>>Enjoy, friend. And seriously, when I leave to go out for 2 hours with the babysitter, I leave the same list — except without the sleeping bag bag.
Enjoy!
have a great time!
Have a great time! Maya’s 11, and we still haven’t gone more than overnight without her. One day, we will…>>I hope you sleep, and enjoy, and come home ready for more sleeping bag bag. 🙂
I’m just jealous that you’ve got a Grammy and Grandpa who are willing to keep your girls. I think Kyle and I are grounded until #3 is potty trained.>>Enjoy la playa…!
I love your list.
I love your directions regarding Thalia. I’ve had to leave directions like that and it makes me realize how individual kids are. >>Have a blast! Can’t wait to hear the stories!
Have a great time!>>That’s a great list. My sitters (family) want that and I’m like, “Hey you raised me, I lived, use common sense!”>>This is because one time I tried writing down all the details and it broke me right down as I saw all the little things on paper, and realized nobody could be me to my kids.>>But it could be okay, anyway. 🙂>>Julie>< HREF="http://theartfulflower.blogspot.com/" REL="nofollow">Using My Words<>
Have a superfantastic time – you deserve it.>>And OMG – how I can relate to: “I’d caution not to think of them as pajama bottoms – think of the as thing that keeps her diaper on.” The incidents I could share… let’s just leave it at poop art.
ha ha! Yeah. the things we just do for them without thinking about it are so weird when you see them with someone else’s eyes, aren’t they? I mean, why does mine need two pairs of PJs presented for choice? And why the necogiations that always end in 10 kisses, 10 hugs, and 10 pats, the last one on her hand, when we know that’s what we’ll end up with anyhow? Weirdness, that’s all. >>(And have a great time. I am totally jealous.)
We just returned from Puerto Vallarta and had a great time. Just remember to say “Buenos Dias” and not “Buenos Dios”. The first is Good Day, the second is Good God. Although, after a few mojitos, you may prefer the second.>>Have fun!
You are so much better of a mom than me! Here’s what I told my inlaws about our nighttime routine when we were about to embark on our first night away—“I’m not worried. I know they like you better than they like us anyway.” Gah!>Have a great trip!
Oh my goodness. I just did the exact same thing when I left my son with my parents for a few days. >>Of course, none of my meticulously laid instructions get followed once I walk out the door, but somehow… it’s all good 🙂>>Have a great time!!! Enjoy it and I promise that guilt will be gone by the time that plane takes off.
Happy sleeping. Stay away from the Cuervo. Tequila will kill ya!
I would totally laugh at the shiny side down bit, except that my own son must have his special star blanket slightly-fuzzier-side-down, or terrible things will ensue.
Good for you! A vacation!>>Hope you enjoy it. Boo and I are heading to the land of Mariachi’s ourselves next month.>>Me, an ocean, a bikini and a margarita.>>Good times.>>Post a pic when you get back, will ya?
OH, have fun! It sounds wonderful.>>I have to laugh at the binky negotiation and the blanket layering. We have both rituals here too and the blankets *must* go in the correct order.
Ah… we were so free before these little people came along. Their nutty routines make us crazy and then we leave them for a little while and then we miss them like crazy. I don’t think I’ll every feel truly free again. OK maybe a little free at nap time. But it’s so fleeting.
<>It’s funny how our kids’ routines seem so, well..routine, until we have to describe them to someone else.<>>>This is so true. I remember the first time I left Julia with my father…I had like, three pages typed out.
Wow, I’m jealous! Have a great time.>>And really, I had no idea blankets ever had to go in a specific order. Cute!
Have fun!>>Love the instructions. Very thoughtful to include the binky negotiation tip. >>And yes, pajama bottoms are definitely the thing that keeps the diaper.>>Drink two Tequila’s for me please.
uhm, that would be “diaper on.” and “two Tequilas”. Long week, late night.
So jealous.>>So very, very jealous.
Hope you had a great time!>>Routines do indeed seem a little less routine when you have to write them down. “Before bedtime, get him a pacifier from the blue bowl in the fridge. No, they don’t need to be kept cold, but it’s the one place he can’t get into himself yet.”
Well I’m officially jealous. Hope you are having a fabulous time!>>I had to write out my son’s routine for his grandparents this weekend. They rolled their eyes, I guess I over-described the routine!
I am soooo jealous! >And this:>>Thalia likes to go to sleep with many binkies. She will ask for “More binkies!” regardless of how many she has. So give her two or three and hold one for negotiation. You will need it.>>>My son exactly!!!!!!!! In Greek, we call binky’s bibila, so he says, ever night, “More bi!” “More bi!” I thought he was the only one….